Porto Bello Tashkent: Uzbekistan's Hidden Gem Hotel (Unbelievable Views!)
Okay, buckle up, because we're about to dive headfirst into the glorious, slightly chaotic, and utterly unforgettable experience that is the Porto Bello Tashkent. This isn't just a hotel review; it's a love letter… with a few (very minor) gripes thrown in for good measure. And let me tell you, this place is a gem. A hidden, shimmering, Uzbekistani gem.
THE UNBELIEVABLE VIEWS! (Let's Talk Visuals, First!)
Okay, first things first. Those views. The views are why you come, they're why you stay, and they're what you'll tell everyone about for months after you leave. I'm talking panoramic, sweeping, jaw-dropping vistas of Tashkent. Honestly, just sitting there, on the balcony of my room (which, by the way, had a balcony! – small wins!), sipping that complimentary tea, and watching the city wake up… it was pure, unadulterated bliss. The sunsets? Forget about it. You'll be Instagramming like a pro, trust me.
Rooms: Comfort, Convenience, and Maybe a Slight Lack of Plug Sockets (But Hey, That's Me!)
Now, about the rooms. They're… well, they're genuinely nice. Really, REALLY nice. I opted for the… hmm… I think it was a Deluxe, or something like that. (My memory's a little fuzzy. Blame the, ahem, happy hour.) There was a HUGE bed, ridiculously comfortable. Blackout curtains (yes!), air conditioning that actually worked (double yes!), and a bathroom that practically begged you to take a long, hot soak in that separate shower and bathtub (triple yes!). The complimentary bottled water was a lifesaver, especially after a long day exploring the city.
- Available in all rooms: Additional toilet, Air conditioning, Alarm clock, Bathrobes, Bathroom phone, Bathtub, Blackout curtains, Carpeting, Closet, Coffee/tea maker, Complimentary tea, Daily housekeeping, Desk, Extra long bed, Free bottled water, Hair dryer, High floor, In-room safe box, Interconnecting room(s) available, Internet access – LAN, Internet access – wireless, Ironing facilities, Laptop workspace, Linens, Mini bar, Mirror, Non-smoking, On-demand movies, Private bathroom, Reading light, Refrigerator, Safety/security feature, Satellite/cable channels, Scale, Seating area, Separate shower/bathtub, Shower, Slippers, Smoke detector, Socket near the bed, Sofa, Soundproofing, Telephone, Toiletries, Towels, Umbrella, Visual alarm, Wake-up service, Wi-Fi [free], Window that opens.
My only real gripe? And this is a minor gripe… I could have used a few more plug sockets. Modern life, right? We travel with so many gadgets! But honestly, it's a tiny blip. Just bring a power strip; you'll be fine. You’re probably thinking, “He’s nitpicking!” And you’re right! I am. Because everything else was so damn good!
Internet Access: Wi-Fi, Wi-Fi Everywhere! (That Free Wi-Fi!)
Speaking of modern life, let's talk internet. Free Wi-Fi? Check! And not just in the rooms, but in the public areas too. I'm talking solid, reliable internet access. I needed to upload some photos, do a bit of work (ugh!), and stream a movie. No problems at all. Bless you, Porto Bello, for the free Wi-Fi!
- Internet:
- Internet access – wireless
- Wi-Fi [free]
- Internet [LAN]: Internet access – LAN
- Internet services:
- Wi-Fi in public areas
- Free Wi-Fi in all Rooms!
Dining, Drinking, and Snacking: Food, glorious food!… And a VERY Good Breakfast!
Okay, the food. This is where things get REALLY interesting.
- Dining, drinking, and snacking: A la carte in restaurant, Alternative meal arrangement, Asian breakfast, Asian cuisine in restaurant, Bar, Bottle of water, Breakfast [buffet], Breakfast service, Buffet in restaurant, Coffee/tea in restaurant, Coffee shop, Desserts in restaurant, Happy hour, International cuisine in restaurant, Poolside bar, Restaurants, Room service [24-hour], Salad in restaurant, Snack bar, Soup in restaurant, Vegetarian restaurant, Western breakfast, Western cuisine in restaurant.
The breakfast buffet? Magnificent. And I'm not exaggerating. Freshly baked pastries, an array of fruits I'd never even SEEN before, and a made-to-order omelet station. I went FULL tourist-mode on the breakfast front. I tried EVERYTHING. Twice. The Asian breakfast options were an absolute delight. (I'm now obsessed with Uzbekistani breakfast porridge. Don't judge.)
I spent a whole afternoon by the poolside bar. Just me and my book. And a few, okay, several, cocktails. The poolside bar staff were incredibly friendly and attentive. That happy hour? Yeah, I may have taken full advantage. The international cuisine in the restaurants - that was another win! The cocktails were perfectly mixed, the food was top-notch, and the atmosphere was super chill.
Things to Do & Ways to Relax: A World of Pampering (and Maybe a Gym?)
Okay, I didn’t use these facilities as much as I should have. Honestly, I was too busy exploring the city and then collapsing face-first into my bed. (See: "Happy Hour," above.)
- Things to do, ways to relax: Body scrub, Body wrap, Fitness center, Foot bath, Gym/fitness, Massage, Pool with view, Sauna, Spa, Spa/sauna, Steamroom, Swimming pool, Swimming pool [outdoor].
BUT! I did peek at the swimming pool, and it looked gorgeous – and that view from the edge of the pool… breathtaking. There's a gym (I saw it!), a spa (might have been a good way to recover from all those cocktails…) and a sauna. If you're the type who likes to pamper yourself, you'll be in heaven.
Cleanliness and Safety: Peace of Mind in Tricky Times
I'm not going to lie; in the current climate, I'm a bit of a germaphobe. But Porto Bello Tashkent gets top marks here. They were clearly taking hygiene seriously.
- Cleanliness and safety: Anti-viral cleaning products, Daily disinfection in common areas, Hand sanitizer, Hygiene certification, Individually-wrapped food options, Physical distancing of at least 1 meter, Professional-grade sanitizing services, Room sanitization opt-out available, Rooms sanitized between stays, Safe dining setup, Sanitized kitchen and tableware items, Staff trained in safety protocol, Sterilizing equipment.
I saw staff cleaning constantly, hand sanitizer stations everywhere, and individually wrapped food items at the buffet. I saw staff wearing masks – and not just in the hotel, but in the general areas too. I felt safe and relaxed.
Accessibility & Services: Catering to Everyone
I didn't personally need any specific accessibility features, but the hotel did have facilities for disabled guests.
- Accessibility: Facilities for disabled guests.
- Services and convenience: Air conditioning in public area, Audio-visual equipment for special events, Business facilities, Cash withdrawal, Concierge, Contactless check-in/out, Convenience store, Currency exchange, Daily housekeeping, Doorman, Dry cleaning, Elevator, Essential condiments, Facilities for disabled guests, Food delivery, Gift/souvenir shop, Indoor venue for special events, Invoice provided, Ironing service, Laundry service, Luggage storage, Meeting/banquet facilities, Meetings, Meeting stationery, On-site event hosting, Outdoor venue for special events, Projector/LED display, Safety deposit boxes, Seminars, Shrine, Smoking area, Terrace, Wi-Fi for special events, Xerox/fax in business center.
And the services? Top-notch. The staff were friendly, helpful, and spoke decent English. The concierge was a lifesaver when it came to organizing taxis and suggesting restaurants. There's also a convenient store (for those late-night snack cravings!), currency exchange (super handy!), and laundry service (for those of us who travel light…ish).
Getting Around: Convenience is Key
They've got you covered when it comes to getting around.
- Getting around: Airport transfer, Bicycle parking, Car park [free of charge], Car park [on-site], Car power charging station, Taxi service, Valet parking. *The airport transfer was seamless, and they have free on-site parking. Perfect.
For The Kids: Good for All Ages!
I didn't have kids with me, but the hotel seemed very family-friendly.
- For the Kids: Babysitting service, Family/child friendly, Kids facilities, Kids meal.
The Tiny Flaws (Because, Real Life):
I’m being honest here, so I need to mention a couple of teeny-tiny things:
Non-smoking rooms: I swear I could sometimes smell a little… residual smoke… in the hallway. It's not a deal-breaker, but worth noting.
Getting Around: Even though they were incredibly
Okay, buckle up, buttercups, because this isn't your aunt Mildred's meticulously planned vacation itinerary. We're diving headfirst into Tashkent, Uzbekistan, and it's gonna be… well, it's going to be something. Specifically, it’s going to be centered around the Porto Bello Hotel, because frankly, after a long flight, a comfy bed is a REAL priority.
THE MESSY, GLORIOUS PORTO BELLO HOTEL & TASHKENT ADVENTURE (or, How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Flat White)
Day 1: Arrival, Jet Lag, and the Quest for Coffee (and Sanity)
- 1:00 AM (local time): Landed in Tashkent. Whoa. That air… smells different. Like… old carpets and impending adventure. The airport, bless its heart, felt… Soviet. Everything was serious. Passport control was a glacial process. My internal monologue was screaming, "Just get me to the hotel!"
- 1:45 AM: Baggage claim… success! (I'd packed a survival kit – snacks, hand sanitizer, and a miniature bottle of Prosecco. Priorities, people.)
- 2:30 AM: Finally, finally in a taxi! The driver was a blur of enthusiastic Uzbek, which I understood only through the language of dramatic hand gestures. I think we discussed the relative merits of Manchester United and the price of potatoes. (I'm pretty sure I lost the potato conversation.)
- 3:00 AM: Porto Bello Hotel! The exterior… charmingly… "vintage." Inside, though, it's actually quite lovely. The lobby is all dark wood and vaguely ornate touches. Relief washed over me. Checked in, grabbed the key, and practically sprinted (waddling, more like it) to the room.
- 3:30 AM: Room inspection. Clean, air-conditioned, bed looks inviting. Success! But the jet lag… oh, the jet lag. My brain is mush.
- 3:35 AM - 9:00 AM (ish): SLEEP. Or, what passes for sleep after a 12-hour flight. Wake up at least four times convinced I’m still on the plane, convinced I've missed my stop.
- 9:00 AM: The Breakfast Buffet Debacle. The hotel advertises "continental breakfast" but what it offers… is a continental breakfast. The pastries. Oh, the pastries. Dry, but, eaten with a healthy dose of jam and my first Uzbek-made coffee… decent enough. This coffee, though… is it the same bean from the flight? No, but it's STRONG.
- 10:00 AM: Wandering around the hotel. The courtyard… surprisingly peaceful. Fountain bubbling, some kind of local bird whistling. Feel a flicker of optimism! Maybe this trip won't be a total disaster.
- 11:00 AM: The "Free Internet" Saga: After asking multiple times and finally getting a staff member who spoke some English I could barely understand, I have the elusive Wi-Fi code. It's faster than dial-up, sure, but uploading a picture… is likely to take me to Day 2.
- 11:30 AM: The flat white quest BEGINS. I need caffeine. I NEED IT. The hotel coffee is… functional, but not inspiring.
- 12:00 PM: Walk into the city to SEARCH for the perfect flat white. (This will essentially become my life for the rest of the trip, let's be honest).
Day 2: Bazaar Bonanza and the Eternal Quest for Coffee Perfection
- 9:00 AM: Breakfast – Same as yesterday, but by now I'm a pro. I've mastered the art of strategically placing fruit on my plate to appear sophisticated, but secretly, I'm still just after more jam.
- 10:00 AM: Explore Chorsu Bazaar! OMG. Colors, smells, chaos! Mountains of spices, dried fruits that look like jewels, and enough people jostling that you're convinced someone will accidentally steal your wallet. (They didn't, but I did nearly buy a hat that looked like a fez. Impulse control, people.)
- 11:30 AM: Coffee stop #2. Found a cafe near the bazaar, it smells like Turkish coffee and a lingering, sweet smoke that reminds me of my childhood home. Espresso, strong, a little bitter, but still… not the flat white. Feeling slightly dejected.
- 1:00 PM: Lunch at a local restaurant. Plov (national rice dish). Huge mounds of rice and meat, it looks great, tastes great. I ate almost all of it! (Don't judge me, I'm on vacation!)
- 2:30 PM: Trying to navigate the metro system. Wish me luck. (I didn't get lost, but I did get stared at.)
- 3:30 PM: Back to the Porto Bello for a nap. (Jet lag is still a beast)
- 5:00 PM: Evening stroll around a park next to the hotel. They said the lights at night were pretty. They were right.
Day 3: Hitching a Ride and the Search for “The One”
- 9:00 AM: Breakfast. Today I try the eggs. They are actually surprisingly good. Am I finally adjusting to this Uzbekistan adventure?
- 10:00 AM: Decide I want to venture out past the inner city. I think I see a church on the outskirts. Decide to use a taxi… but…
- 10:15 AM: Taxi drivers are… intense. Negotiation is a skill. I failed at negotiating.
- 10:30 AM: Hitch a ride (illegal, I know… but I'll tell you, more comfortable).
- The driver was a lovely old man with a booming laugh. He was wearing what looked like a bathrobe and playing very loud Uzbek music on his cassette player. We barely spoke the same language, but we communicated via the universal languages of smiles and exaggerated hand gestures.
- The man was a bit of a speed demon, but the ride, once I finally let go of the fear of imminent death, was truly something.
- 12:00 PM: The church. Gorgeous. So many colors. The inside was all gold and prayer. It was humbling.
- 2:00 PM: Back in the city. Flat white mission, AGAIN.
- 2:15 PM: New Cafe. This one, based on reviews, could be the place. Walk in. The barista, handsome, with a smile that could launch a thousand ships, gives me a wink.
- 2:20 PM: Flat White. perfection. That first sip… that was the moment I understood Uzbekistan. No, that was the moment I understood life.
- 2:30 PM: I'm going to come back to this same cafe, same cup, same barista, and just live here.
Day 4: The (Hopefully) Less-Messy Finale
- 9:00 AM: Breakfast…eggs again. Actually, this is going well.
- 10:00 AM - Noon: Last minute souvenirs/shopping. Because I'm a tourist and the airport awaits.
- Noon - 1:00 PM: One last flat white. At that cafe. Savoring every drop. (Might even try to learn a little Uzbek to say thank you).
- 1:00 PM - 2:00 PM: Pack, leave a tip, say goodbye to the Porto Bello. (Actually, I waved to the staff until they were out of sight).
- 2:00 PM: Taxi to the airport. It's been an adventure, Uzbekistan. I'll be back.
- Ongoing: The airport, the flight, the long journey home. But I'll always remember the flat white. And those pastries. And the fact that I really did manage to survive a trip across the world with only minor nervous breakdowns.
- P.S.: Buy a travel adapter before you go! You'll need it. Trust me.
Porto Bello Tashkent: Your Chaotic Guide to a Hidden Oasis!
So, Porto Bello...Is it *really* as good as everyone says? Or is it just Instagram hype?
Okay, deep breaths. Let me tell you, the views? Yeah, they're real. *Unbelievable* even. Think postcard-perfect sunsets painting the mountains, and you're halfway there. The hype? Well, it's earned. BUT, and this is a big BUT, it's not *perfect*. More on that later. Let's just say, my camera roll exploded. My therapist might need to see those photos. It's that breathtaking. The pictures, though, don't capture the *feeling*…that overwhelming sense of being utterly *elsewhere*.
How do you *actually* get there? I'm assuming it's not like, right next to the airport.
Ah, the journey! Let's just say Google Maps is your friend, but also your *enemy*. It's a bit of a trek from Tashkent itself. Expect a drive, maybe with a few scenic U-turns if you're like me and have a penchant for "exploring." The roads are…well, they're Uzbek roads. Some are smooth, some are...character-building. Consider it part of the adventure! I'd strongly recommend arranging transportation through the hotel, or a reputable local driver. Trust me, it saves you the headache of figuring out which pothole is the deepest. Lost in translation? Possibly. Memorable? Absolutely.
What about accommodation? The rooms...are they luxurious or more 'rustic charm'?
Alright, so let's talk rooms. Think "charm" leaning towards "rustic". Don't go expecting a five-star city hotel pampering. There are gorgeous rooms, with all the standard amenities, but remember, we're in Uzbekistan! A little "quirk" is to be expected. I was in a room with the most incredible balcony overlooking the valley - that, my friends, made up for *everything*. The beds were comfy. The showers, thankfully, had hot water (a lifesaver, honestly). Just don't expect the marble floors and gold-plated faucets. It's more like, "Cozy retreat with a view that'll make you weep." And the view, honestly, is the *real* luxury here.
Food! What's the dining situation like? Should I pack snacks? Because...I get 'hangry'.
Food is…a journey in itself. The restaurant has decent Uzbek fare, with stunning views. This is not a Michelin-star place, people, so manage your expectations. I'm talking plov (the national dish - rice with meat and veggies), kebabs, and all the usual suspects. The breakfast buffet, I remember, was surprisingly good, and I have an eye for breakfast buffets! The service felt genuinely trying to please, but sometimes...things might take a *while*. Bring snacks. Always bring snacks! Especially if you, like me, turn into a grumpy gremlin if you're even *slightly* hungry. A little emergency Snickers bar can save a vacation, believe me. And the tea? Oh, the tea is divine.
Are there activities? Or is it just, like, staring at the view? Because...I can do that, but I need *something* to keep me busy!
Okay, yes, there *is* more than just staring (though that's a major draw!). There's hiking in the nearby mountains, which...I started once. It looked AMAZING. Then halfway through I decided the view from the balcony was just *as* good and headed back to the plush chair. Seriously, though, the trails look spectacular, the nature around it is impressive. You can arrange excursions through the hotel, too. There's a pool. And you can always, always, just…breathe. Unplug. Read a book. It's the perfect place to do absolutely nothing, but still feel like you're *doing* something. Just breathing in the air.
The Pool - is it as gorgeous as the photos? Is it crowded?
The pool…yes, it's a stunner. Bordering on the cinematic. Those photos? Not Photoshopped. The infinity edge blends seamlessly with the landscape. The water is…refreshing. Sometimes, though, the pool is freezing. (I went in October. Mistake.) Crowded? Well, it depends. On weekdays, usually not. Weekends…maybe a little. It's not exactly a massive pool, so if a family of ten decides to do cannonballs simultaneously, you might be dodging splashes. But mostly? It's bliss. Just imagine yourself there. You deserve it.
Okay, spill the tea! What were the downsides? What *really* happened? Be brutally honest!
Alright, here comes the honesty bomb. Firstly, the Wi-Fi. Don't expect blazing speeds. Think…glacial. Embrace the digital detox. Seriously. It's kind of awesome. Secondly, service can be slow. Patience is a virtue, and you'll need it. The biggest hiccup of my trip? I witnessed the kitchen *completely* run out of ice cream. Yes. You read that right. ICE CREAM. The horror! It was a hot day, I was craving something sweet, and…nothing. Crushed. (Okay, dramatic, I know.) But it's those littleInstant Hotel Search
